By Aimee Runyon For those of us recovering from a drug or alcohol addiction, dating can be a complicated and confusing world.
When you finally do decide to start dating again it is important to seek the advice of those in your support group to make sure the time is right.
Honesty from the beginning will help build the foundation for a lasting relationship.
Although the idea of dating people with a past history of drug and alcohol use can be a turnoff for some, it won’t be for everyone.
While there are a lot of benefits to dating those in recovery, it can also lead to risky situations.
There are often times in which one partner relapses and the other follows, although this isn’t a guarantee.
This means limiting meetings that you attend together and limiting the amount you talk about your own recovery programs.
For someone in recovery, that can lead to missed meetings, missed calls to your sponsor, and slacking on participation in your daily program.
Whether it is a replacement to fill the void that drugs and alcohol used to fill, or a distraction from actually working on yourself, getting into a relationship too early can lead to complications and consequences for you and your partner.
Here are a few tips that can help you navigate the new world of dating in sobriety: Tip #1 - Decide If You Want to Date Others in Recovery or “Normies”This can be something that changes over time or on a case-to-case basis, although there are many who typically date one or the other.
There are many sponsors in 12-step programs who will suggest that once you make that list, you aim to achieve many of those qualities yourself, then you naturally attract people who have those qualities.
If you’ve heard the old saying “water seeks its own level” this is what that speaks to.
Not all codependents are unhappy, while others live in pain or quiet desperation.